Elisabeth Beckwitt
Empowering artist Elisabeth Beckwitt is kicking off the new year with a brand new project titled Other Side Of Sober.
The new EP touches on life, relationships, grieving and recovery.
“This project is about what life looks like on the other side; all the anger, confusion, pain, grief, relief, joy, transition, waves, maintenance, and processing that goes into recovery,” says Beckwitt.
With the help of producer/writing partner Jason Threm, of TME. the EP includes the previous singles “Lovely”, “Think You Are” and “Fake It”.
Now almost 8 years clean, Beckwitt is encouraging everyone to own their power and self-worth while allowing themselves the time to grieve.
Other Side Of Sober is now available worldwide.
Photo credit: Roots of the Rose Photography
Hi Elisabeth, how are you? What have you been up to since our first interview?
Hello! I am wonderful, thank you again for having me! Fall has been busy with the releases of my new singles, “Lovely,” “Think You Are,” and “Fake It,” as well as getting back into the Sofar Sounds community (my favorite way to tour), planning the expansion of my brand/business Sad Girl Music, and enjoying quality time with my almost husband and our pups in Nashville. I’ve also been preparing for a busy start to the new decade which includes my new EP dropping on January 10th and 5 gigs lined up for January!
Other Side Of Sober is your new EP. How would you describe this project?
This project is about what life looks like on the other side; all the anger, confusion, pain, grief, relief, joy, transition, waves, maintenance, and processing that goes into recovery. Living through the ebbs and flows, riding the waves instead of fighting them; balancing recovery, grief, change, and my relationships. Casual Breakup, Think You Are, and Grieving are all songs about grieving parts of your life; grieving a platonic or casual relationship, an addiction, or just a difficult time. Fake It and Waves are songs about maintaining that balance, and figuring out what works best for you at any given moment. Learning to accept that it will change, and it’s okay to be scared, angry, sad, hopeless, excited, happy...it’s okay to feel.
When did you start working on it? Who helped you create it?
This project marks the third EP that I have made with Jason Threm of TME, and he steps it up a level every time. We started having regular cowrites at the beginning of 2019 that really changed the way I approached songwriting. We were about to go into the rollout of my summer EP, “Indigo,” and started writing all these revolutionary songs about empowerment and change. It became clear early in the year that we needed to start planning the next project, and we had chosen the final 6 songs by May, before my first single from “Indigo” had even been released! I am so honored to have a team of trustworthy, hard-working, and wonderful humans, and was thrilled to have Andy Freeman of ‘Studio Punch Up!’ back to mix this one, and Piper Payne of ‘Infrasonic Mastering’ again to master it. My brilliant fiancé, Django, is behind the artwork.
What did you learn about yourself after finishing this project?
I learned that I thrive when I am creating and releasing music, and I learned how to take care of myself when I’m not. Artists are constantly waging a war against being “stuck,” and I think that is only exacerbated when you are living with a mental illness. My depression feeds off the moments when I am stagnant; as if to say that I am only worthy when I’m moving. You are always worthy; productivity is not happiness. Once I started allowing myself time to live in the in between I started loving myself fiercer than I ever had before.
What made you want to call your project Other Side Of Sober?
“Gray Again” was about the earlier stages of my recovery; a time when I was struggling with finding treatment options that worked for me. “Indigo” was like my ‘break up song’ to my addiction, my way of saying that I’m ready to move on and I don’t want it in my life anymore. I thought it just made sense to get the title of this third EP from the single ‘Think You Are’. My favorite line is “recovery is a wave washing over me to the other side of sober.” It encapsulated all the confusion and uncertainty of recovery. This song speaks to a phenomenon that I think people aren’t really aware of because we don’t talk about it a lot. The idea of grieving the negative things in your life. Missing your addiction, mental health problems, self-harm, eating disorders, etc, is normal. Recovery is about managing those moments, and treating yourself with kindness. This song, this whole EP really, is another step in grieving my addiction; a love letter to the me before recovery.
What's the story behind the song "Grieving"? What did you feel when writing it?
“Grieving” is the only song on this EP that was not written with my producer, Jason Threm. I wrote this song with my good friend Kate Puckett, who is an inspirational Pop artist here in Nashville. As with most of my songs on this record, I was processing a therapy session in the form of songwriting. We were discussing how taboo it is to miss anything negative; such as a toxic relationship, bad time in your life, etc. If something was a big part of your life, even if it caused you pain, it was still important. Writing this song was a huge relief; it erased the shame I had been feeling for missing my addiction, and I felt safe writing with a friend who could relate.
What was the hardest part about making this EP? And what was the best part?
The hardest part was definitely the turnaround time between this project and the last. We wanted to build on the momentum from “Indigo,” and also work around the holidays. I was overwhelmed and anxious a lot…and I would do it all again. This record has some of my favorite lyrics I’ve ever written. I feel like I really pushed the boundary on what I consider “safe,” and tapped into an anger inside of me that was quite healing. “Think You Are” is the most vulnerable song I have ever written, and it honestly terrifies me to think of my parents hearing that song and truly seeing my pain and darkness. I think that’s what music is all about...exposing and processing the parts of ourselves that we label as “bad,” and helping others know that they are never alone.
What message do you want to convey through this EP?
I want to encourage you to own your power and self-worth while reminding you that it’s okay to allow yourself time to grieve. Whether you’re grieving for the loss of love or the loss of the negative emotions, habits, and thought patterns that have held you back for so long; grieving these things is all a part of the process. Recovery is hard. The Other Side Of Sober sometimes isn’t as beautiful as we dream it will be. If you work on yourself, and learn to accept and change how you approach new situations you will grow beyond belief.
Could you take us on your recovery process? Which steps did you have to take?
I am almost 8 years clean. My recovery has not been a straight line. I’m thankful now for the people in my life who pushed me to get the help that I needed, even if at the time I was resistant. Finding a good fit in a therapist is hard, and the process itself almost turned me off to the whole practice. I’m now a fierce advocate for therapy, and see my therapist once or twice a month. I truly believe I would not still be here without therapy. Recovery is a little bit like grief. It looks different for everyone, and it is incredibly complicated. There are times I feel so strong and proud of myself, and times when it feels like getting clean was a choice that I didn’t make. I wrote “Think You Are” when I was in an angry place. People kept telling me over and over again how strong I was...and that was only a fraction of what was really going on. Throughout this recovery process I’ve felt like I failed, like I didn’t accomplish anything, like I’ve just floated along and suddenly I’m 8 years clean. That dark feeling isn’t my truth all the time, and it was a huge turning point for me in my recovery process when I stopped shaming myself for speaking that truth.
What advices would you give to anyone going through any form of addiction?
Recovery is hard, messy, confusing, unpredictable, painful, frustrating, nostalgic, dark, scary, long, and powerful. It took me a very long time to accept that I had to grieve my addiction. I experienced a lot of shame around this; am I allowed to grieve something negative? Something dark and twisted like addiction? Does that make me a bad person? Recovery looks different for everyone, and is never linear. Be patient and kind with yourself. You are not alone, you are not bad. You are beautiful.
What lessons did you learn in 2019?
Fake it till you make it! My therapist and I have had many conversations about how hard it is to be in an industry where you are constantly having to prove your worth. Over the past few years in Nashville, she’s seen me work through crippling anxiety, comparing myself to others, hopelessness, worthlessness, feelings of not deserving this. We’ve worked on trying to incorporate the energy that I feel when I’m on stage; powerful, confident, open, loved; into my day to day life. I started making these little adjustments and letting my stage persona take over for me when life got a little too hazy. I’ve been in therapy for almost 10 years, and sometimes the work gets so tiring. It’s okay to fake it a little bit to keep yourself safe. Just own it when you get to the other side like the QUEEN that you are!
What are your goals for 2020?
Practice patience and mindfulness, ask for help when I need it, put value on my accomplishments (no matter how small or large I deem them), appreciate the beauty around me, and work to help others find their self-love.
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