Xondra
Xondra is a beautiful talent who truly has something to say. With this debut EP Tedious & Brief, the singer/songwriter writes about poignant subjects like grief. This EP offers an empowering message for any woman who’s ever been been in an abusive relationship. It’s important to speak up and to let people know that they’re not alone. It’s an audacious and honest project that definitely deserve a lot of love. Congrats Xondra for creating and releasing Tedious & Brief.
Tedious & Brief is now available everywhere.
Introduce yourself - what's your story?
My name is Xondra and I’m a singer-songwriter from Long Island, New York. I love all things creative, whether it be writing poetry, music, acting, directing, sewing, etc. I started writing music when I was 6 or 7 years old and have not stopped since. I live my life in constant observation of the people around me and the experiences I go through. There is nothing I love more than a good story. Songwriting is my true love and always has been.
What did you grow up listening to?
I was raised with a lot of music being played around me. My mom always played music in the car that we would sing at the top of our lungs. The CDs that were played the most were artists like Natalie Merchant, the B-52s, Bob Marley, and Mary J Blige. My stepfather got me into The Beatles as a child, which ended up being a big influence of mine as I began to really dig into songwriting. As far as music I found on my own, I loved pop and R&B. I was obsessed with TLC, Beyonce, Taylor Swift, Jojo, Mariah Carey, etc.
What gave you the confidence to be an artist and release your original music? What was the biggest challenge when you first started?
My first heartbreak really pushed me to start releasing music. One of my good friends started dating my ex boyfriend less than a week after we broke up and it launched me into a songwriting spiral. I couldn’t stop writing to cope with the pain. It gave me the confidence to start sharing my music more because I was sure the pain I was feeling was not unique. I started to want to perform, record, and release original music because I wanted to connect with people during a time I was feeling so disconnected. The biggest challenge in the beginning was facing the fear of putting music out in the world and receiving criticism. It definitely did happen and continues to happen on a regular basis but my skin has gotten a lot thicker at this point. I’m really grateful for all the experiences I’ve had, regardless of how painful they were, for helping me get to where I am today as an artist.
When did you know you were good at what you were doing?
Getting into Purchase College’s Conservatory Of Music was really validating for me because it was the first time I had industry professionals look at me and tell me I had potential. I knew that songwriting was something I was supposed to do since I was a little girl but to get into a program that helps train you to become a professional songwriter/recording artist in the industry confirmed all my hopes that this is the right path for me.
Who was the first person to ever believe in you?
My mom and nana have always been my biggest cheerleaders. They always encouraged me to express myself in whatever way I wanted to. They saw that writing was something that came easily and naturally to me and believed I could be whatever wanted to be. It is an amazing thing to still be able to call them up when I’m having a rough day and be reminded that I always have them supporting me and believing that I can make it in an industry that can be so difficult to break into.
"Tedious & Brief" is your new EP - what's the story/inspiration behind this record?
I wrote the songs for Tedious & Brief during a very low point in my life. I was grappling with memories of abuse while unknowingly in an abusive relationship. I felt stuck and heavy with the feeling that I'd never know what it is like to feel safe. I read the poetry book , "Life Of The Party" by Olivia Gatwood and it touched me in a way no other piece of literature had before. I couldn't stop thinking about it. I couldn’t sleep for weeks because every night I'd have nightmares about the senseless violence that women face everyday. I felt crushed under the weight of sadness I felt for women everywhere. Tedious & Brief is a story of survival. It is a scream of truth in a room of hushed voices. This is my first body of work that I created a whole world for. It is about the underbelly of grief, whether it be grieving past versions of yourself or relationships you wish could be repaired but can’t be.
Could you describe the songwriting/production process for this project? Who helped you create it?
I wrote all the songs alone in the house I was living in at the time in Connecticut. It was a very emotional songwriting process for me because I was writing the songs to cope with the hard feelings I was having regarding grief. I have never cried so much while writing a project. I would just sit with my guitar for hours working through my feelings until I was so tired that I had to stop. When it came to recording the EP, I mainly worked with James MacPherson and Shubham Mondal. It was a really incredible experience. It was nice to work with people that understood the sound I was going for and made it happen so smoothly. It was an emotional experience for me and the both of them helped make me comfortable while we recorded such sensitive material. I will forever be grateful for the experience of recording Tedious & Brief because it helped kickstart me taking my career to the next level.
What different topics are you talking about on this project?
I talk a lot about grief and the different feelings that come along with it. "Tedious" is about learning to give yourself the time, energy, and love that you give to others. "Brief" is about people who watch you struggling and kick you when you’re down. There is a common theme of getting comfortable with the uncomfortable parts of life instead of being in denial about them. "Waterworks" is about being punished for being sensitive because the people around you want you to act like the things happening are normal when they are far from it. "Dead Girl" is about the desensitization of violence against women. "Inner Child" is about lovingly embracing your pain in order to heal. Lastly, "Life Force" is from the point of view of a ghost, haunting all the people that led to your demise. It’s about sometimes feeling that nobody would care all that much if you were gone from their lives. It is a prayer that maybe just maybe, you’d miss me if I wasn’t here.
What did you feel when writing "Inner Child"?
I was really sad. I went on a solo hike in the middle of the winter, fell and bruised the whole side of my body, came home crying and immediately wrote "Inner Child." I sat in my car in my driveway thinking, "is this really my life?" I was feeling really isolated and had the realization that no matter how far I was from home, I could never out run myself and the hard feelings I was scared to examine. I finally let go and wrote "Inner Child."
What do you want people to feel when listening to this EP?
I want people to feel heard and accepted as they are, in whatever part of their healing process they may be in. I wrote this for the people who are learning how to live after only being in survival mode their entire lives. I want them to feel like they have somebody who gets it and that they are not alone.
As an artist, what is the hardest part? And what is the best part?
The hardest part is balancing working a day job and trying to elevate your career. It can be super exhausting to try to find time to run your whole creative business when you’re working a 40 hour work week. The best part is the feeling after you push through and let yourself enjoy the process of building your career from the ground up. I love getting to create everyday, even if it means that for right now, I have to work a day job to support my artistic endeavors. I love literally every step of the process because it feels good to see and feel your growth little by little.
How's it like to be a woman in the music industry? What message do you want to give to women out there?
It is hard out here. There are so many magical beautiful talented women in music making waves in the industry despite so many obstacles they have to face daily. There are so many expectations and judgements placed on us and it can be incredibly difficult to navigate. To my lovely ladies out there, do not let anything stand in your way. On your way to success you will face so many hardships and failures but you cannot let that stop you. Learn to make light out of every lesson and remember how capable and deserving you are of everything you desire. I believe you and you should too.
What are your thoughts on today's music industry? If you could change one thing, what would it be?
I think the industry is too invested in money and not enough in music. Good music brings good money. Of course , artists need support to help make that happen but the priority should be creating meaningful art in a world that is starving for meaning and connection. If I could change one thing, It would be more support for independent artists. There is not enough education on how to succeed in the industry if you don’t have a lot of money. There are so many talented capable people that do not have the support they need to get their careers off the ground. If we invested in smaller artists and the future of the industry, we could create so much new value instead of just lifting up the 10 artists that are on replay on the radio.
What biggest life lessons have you learned so far?
Feel the fear and do it anyway! I used to be so paralyzed with fear that I couldn’t do anything until everything was 100% perfect, which is impossible. I have grown and learned so much more in the messiness of learning as you go. There is no time to waste. The world needs your art and you have to go out there and find the people that it is meant for.
In your opinion, what would make the world a better place?
A larger importance placed on vulnerability and emotional intelligence!!! If we were all able to communicate our needs and feelings to each other in a more effective way, so many problems would be solved or minimized. I think we can be too reactive instead of taking the time to process and respond. We need to slow down, feel our feelings, and communicate in a more kind way. It can be way easier said than done but if we all started working on it , I think we’d be a lot happier as a society.
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