"Ego Death" by KTJ & CARLY

The definition of an ego death is complete loss of subjective self-identity. After you achieve an ego death, people will experience what is called “transcendence.” They become their highest self, yet no self, just a simple awareness of nothing.

The five layers of the ego: Fear, attachment, aversion, ego, and ignorance. The five layers could also be described as the physical; security, social, the ego, and the practice of self-actualization. This involves the need for air, food, water, safety, shelter, stability, being loved, included, belonging, self-esteem, power, prestige, recognition, and the need for development. Of course we need some of this to survive, but as much as you can strip away, the smaller your ego becomes. We needed our ego to survive back in the day, and in the materialistic world we exist in today, there are quite a lot of people who depend on their fragile egos being stroked to survive emotionally. Someone once said, “The ego is how you identify and what you identify with—like who you are as a person, whether it's gender identity, what your beliefs are, your morals.”

To kick off the EP, we start with the song, “Soliloquy.” This song is all about confronting the person in the mirror. Trying to figure out who you are and genuinely asking yourself, “How do I identify myself? How do I fit into the world? What are my morals? What are my beliefs?” Figuring out who you are is the most important step in understanding how you work as a human being and wanting to understand how to change something about yourself. At the end of the day, one is not so easily defined. Even the guy we sing about in Daddy’s Little Lawyer.

“Daddy’s Little Lawyer,” is all about the power of indifference and not needing the validation of someone in a relationship; they wronged you, and you don’t care anymore because you’re free and can see it for what it truly was. The lyrics are all about not caring anymore. The “who can care less” game always backfires on men with fragile egos, and at the end of the day the only one who can fix them is themselves. This song in particular is a true story and was written about a guy that had wronged one of us and I just woke up one day and decided that I honestly didn’t care at all. That if he was going to string me along and not commit, then I did not want to waste my energy feeding into his ego. Feeding his ego, I was essentially starving myself. So I stopped. I realized when someone plays games to gain power in a relationship, it's simply just rooted in nothing but insecurity projected onto another.

The third track is “Pink Ferrari.” This is one of our favorite songs on the EP. In the world today, mental health is slowly becoming less stigmatized, but only because mental health is at an all time low in the world. With social media, we believe that everyone lives an aesthetically pleasing picture perfect life 24/7. This song is all about not caring about what people think about you. We all have demons, so be proud of facing them and your fears, be a decent human being, and don’t let the haters fight you. The lyric in the hook says “Invited all my demons to the afterparty, let them all in better safe than sorry.” In therapy, they always say we must bring the problems to the surface in order to deal with them. That is what is happening in the song. Instead of hiding who we are, we live our lives authentically as it comes without seeking validation outside of ourselves. Learning to love your flaws regardless of what is happening around you.

The fourth song of the EP is “Heartless.” This song was inspired originally by the movie “Ghosts of Girlfriends Past,” with Matthew McConaughey. It's about a bachelor at his finest. Spoiler alert, he realizes chasing money and power never gave him the love that he needed.

It was also inspired by the movie “The Family Man” with Nicolas Cage. The film follows a man who for his whole life has chased money and power instead of love. Suddenly, an angel comes into his life and when he goes to bed on Christmas Eve alone, he wakes up with a wife and two loving children. At first he hates it, but the second he decides he never wants it to end, he wakes up to the life he originally chose for himself. Now stuck in his mundane power driven lifestyle, he is filled with regret. This song is all about the layer of the ego that is driven by power and money. Heartless is about a man who lived his whole life working, resulting in an empty funeral. This track is one of my favorites and was really fun to write and produce.

“Signing Off” is the final song of the EP. This song is lyrically my favorite. This song is about being so mentally and physically exhausted that you simply must sign off; Power down. Shut down the ego. It's the feeling of being so overwhelmed, but you can't find the purpose to do anything. There is a constant expectation of having to do everything all at once, and being the best at it. However, doing nothing, can sometimes be everything. There's a moment in deep meditation when you shut down, and you become nothing but awareness. It's beautiful. There's no stress there, and your intuition becomes clearer than ever.

Speaking from personal experience, sometimes I will go online and compare myself to everyone; girls who are constantly being successful, pretty, sociable, outgoing, and talented... I find myself trying to overcompensate, trying to make my life online seem so much better than it actually is just so I can keep up. But most of social media is fake. Miley Cyrus said it best; “Nobody’s Perfect.” and a lot of people edit their pictures to perfection. It's not worth beating yourself down trying to be better, when you can just be you. Sometimes, the best medicine, like I said, is to just unplug. Sign off. Sign off of your ego. Let go and just be.

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